Nineteen

n 1798, Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi, the author of the Tanya and the Shulchan Aruch, was imprisoned on the false charges that his teachings undermined the authority of the czar of Russia (in truth, he was spreading Torah). For 52 days he was held in the Peter-Paul
Fortress in Petersburg. He was miraculously released on the 19th of Kislev.

Among the Rebbe's interrogators was a government minister who possessed broad knowledge of the Bible and Jewish studies. On one occasion, he asked the Rebbe to explain the verse in Beraishis (3:9): "And Hashem called out to Adam and said to him: 'Where are you?'" Did
Hashem not know where Adam was?

Rabbi Schneur Zalman presented the explanation offered by several of the commentaries: the question "Where are you?" was merely a "conversation opener" on the part of Hashem, who did not wish to unnerve Adam by immediately confronting him with his wrongdoing.

"What Rashi says, I know," said the minister. "I wish to hear how the Rebbe understands the verse."
"Do you believe that the Torah is eternal?" asked the Rebbe. "Do you believe that its every word applies to every individual, under all conditions, at all times?"
"Yes," replied the minister. Rabbi Schneur Zalman was extremely gratified to hear this. The czar's minister had affirmed a principle which lies at the basis of the teachings of Rabbi Yisroel Baal Shem Tov, the very teachings and ideology for which he was standing trial!

"'Where are you?'" explained the Rebbe, "is Hashem's perpetual call to every man. Where are you in the world? What have you accomplished? You have been allotted a certain number of days, hours, and minutes in which to fulfill your mission in life. You have lived so many years
and so many days," -- here Rabbi Schneur Zalman spelled out the exact age of the minister -- "Where are you? What have you achieved?"

Exercise for the day: Ask yourself these questions: Where am I holding b'ruchniyus?
What am I achieving? What have I achieved this past month?
If you don't like your answers for any reason- What one thing am I going to improve upon?

In response to the Candle:

What is a flame?
As the days and minutes tick past, leading up to the holiday of lights, we ask ourselves,
What is a flame?

A flame is an everlasting light, a piece of something, but really it's nothing... is it? What is light?

A flame only exists attached to a wick, a snippet of cotton, a stick of wood, meaningless, right?

What is it that draws us, warms and enlightens us- what is this conglomerate of nothing and something that entraps me, making my eyes shine?

The flame is my soul.

It's inside of me, on top of my head, outside of me, flittering here and there, it reminds me of me.
It's the part of my being stiff and hard, it's the part of me silent and yearning. It's the part of me that's bound to time, space, and my stomach's rumbling. It's the part of me that wants to transcend, to fly away, to leave the confinement behind and join the bigger flame. It's the part where I want nothing but- nothing.

Struggle.
Which will win?

Yet there descends a strange peace, a content and tranquility which never before visited the earth.
With every flame there descends ESSENCE. Mutuality. Working together. Common goal.

Mean it!

When the going gets tough, the tough get going.
Where are you going? I ask myself, where am I going, that I have to run so fast?
I hope to a good place.
A real place.
An honest place.
A place where G-d dwells.

What do the great ones say?
Not to do it becausse you've been doing it all your life,
because you did it yesterday, the day before last, since you were five,
but find within yourself that drive to do it...
Because...
you
want it.
Break all the nicknames, all the routines and cliches.
Why are you washing your hands in the morning?
Not because you did so yesterday.
Not because that's what we do.
Not even because you've got impurity on your hands.

Because you
inside
deeply
care.
About
Him.
And His relationship
with you.